So what is it?
What prompts some people into immediate action and others never feel it?
What is it that drives some people to get up and go, move mountains, change the world and create an amazing lifestyle and not others?
Some days I wonder if I even have that gene in my body.
Is it laziness, complacency, lack of passion or lack of self-esteem or is it that when I feel like this it is that I’m not worthy enough of good things, nice things, not worthy enough to have money or even a great lifestyle?
Is this something genetically encoded in me or is it conditioning from another generation or is the lack of trust in humanity?
These thoughts and feelings run through my existence and I wonder and ask questions yet I know I do not receive answers.
Do family patterns and conditionings play a part in this? Yes! I believe they add to the many layers of how unique we are.
I also believe that things like our Human design chart, Natal Charts and Numerology and recently I have discovered gene keys all of these have clues to this but they don’t hold the answers.
The only place the answers can be found is within and this is a lifelong journey of inner work, but to do this you need the right support and the time to allow your nervous system to adapt and perceive things as comfortable and even joyful and not as a threat.
I know this is the key to what my nervous system perceives as threats and not joy. This is something I am working on in a very safe group setting and it is life-changing though at times a slow process.
To quote my teacher “the nervous system loves time”.
For me what I have experienced so far is that the nervous system likes the slow pace to change and heal.
So what does this have to do with lack of motivation, trust, becoming a hermit, and not being able to turn on the action?
Well to me it feels like the key to the things that need to be soothed and loved, not pushed aside or squashed down.
The main part of this equation is the action and if the nervous system isn’t comfortable with the action then I can’t take the step.
If it feels like a perceived threat then my system will act accordingly. it may not even be a physical threat but the stress hormones are released and the nervous system reacts to that. In human design, this is part of the spleen centre as well. The spleen centre is our survival centre it’s where our in-the-moment safety intuition lives our primal instinct for fight or flight. This centre is the one that says run if you are being chased by something threatening, unfortunately, in today’s world, many of us have run our nervous system on high alert for so long that we suffer from burnout and shutdown.
So how do you recover from burnout? that is something I am still working on after 3 decades of living with burnout it’s not an overnight fix it is a slow process. One that I hope to live long enough to see the results of, for now with my limited understanding as I work on my nervous system and allow it time is that the oldest and most primal part of my nervous system is activated and that it is my go-to pattern. This is the part of my nervous system that shuts down or collapses and becomes unavailable when I feel overwhelmed by too much too quickly. It becomes unavailable and this is a long-term habit of at least 2 decades that I am aware of.
As I sit here writing this, I realise that I’ve been hard on myself and pushed myself far too hard to do things when I don’t feel comfortable doing them.
When I don’t want to say yes but I do!
Giving myself the gift of time is the best thing I can do for motivation and action.
It’s the only thing I can do for burnout!
It’s not laziness, complacency, or lack of motivation. It certainly has elements of self-esteem and not being enough but for the most part, it’s fear. Fear is locked and encoded into my nervous system which perceives changes as a threat to my survival.
Now more than ever as I see and know this, I am determined to let my nervous system have the time it needs to feel comfortable with change and let me take the time to feel joy and even pleasure as the change settles into my body.
If this speaks to you then I encourage you to find some support for your nervous system Somatic experiencing practitioners are trained to do nervous system work.
Things like Human Design, Numerology and Astrology chart readings will give you some insights into your preordained personality this can give you a little more insight into the complex uniqueness that is you.
But the biggest gift you can give yourself is time, create pauses in your day and stillness give your system time to catch up and not feel overwhelme.
Let it feel loved.
Thank you for reading and being open to exploring yourself more.
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